Thursday, September 20, 2007

Skinsuit Diet (Day 3)

(My son wears size am I going to squeeze into this?!)
Eat to ride, not ride to eat...
sounds simple enough.
I was doing great until I had dinner with my cousins tonight...Therese made her irresistible ravioli...that's all I can say.
As for cross practice (Cross Practice! Yeah!), I am:
-still slow to warm up
-still horribly awkward on dismounts & shouldering (and damn...I forgot about that right shoulder soreness)
-still tentative in the tight corners
-faster on the descents
-stronger on the short, steep climbs
Leaving my kid this afternoon sucked...just plain sucked. Babysitter arrived (not the one he has a crush on), the tears started immediately. Real tears.
A quick kiss, "I'll be back soon, I love you."
By the time I reached the bottom of the driveway, I could hear the piercing wails.
Shit, my phone!
I had to go back inside to retrieve my cell phone...big mistake.
Now he was in full-bore hysterics...sobbing, blotchy, boogie bubbles...the works.
"I'm going to grab my phone and use the bathroom...then I'm going for a short bike ride. I will be back to read you stories before nap."
I use the bathroom and as I'm leaving (again), Kiddo is screaming, "Pee some more, mommmmmy!! Pee some more and don't leave!"
Then I do the wrong thing. Again.
I sit beside him, give him a hug...pop in his favorite Scooby DVD.
It gets worse.
I give him a packet of candy corn.
So, not only am I sending the message that the babysitter is incapable of comforting him, but I am placating him with candy and movies.
Of course when I got home, he was fine...Babysitter informed me that he was slow to calm down, but eventually ate all his lunch & played. The television was still on and his little eyes were bleary from crying (like me, he doesn't recover quickly from tears...the blotchiness and puffy eyes remain seemingly forever).
I felt like a lousy mom.
Lately, my son is very clingy or wants nothing to do with me (and he's not afraid to say so)...nothing in between.
I know this "phase" (so tired of that word) is a reflection of the fact that my husband is here for bath time and bedtime stories at best...I know the Little Guy misses his daddy...I'm sure he senses that our family is stressed (daddy's hours, my grandpop's failing health, the arrival of Baby Rob). Kids sense these things, kids know when their little world is amiss.
Ughhhh...I just want a beer.
...the Skinsuit Diet says, "No!"

1 comment:

Frank Brigandi said...

I just wanna get some training's a long way back for fat guys with broken bodies....
Little man will be o.k. he just needs to get used to your routine of riding, kids need a routine. when things change they get a bit joggy at first because it's different than the last time.. not too big of a deal. You're a good mommy, beer is good too.
my new fave flying dog double IPA..... I saw god when the first icy cold sip hit my taste buds...... I am doomed....