Thursday, December 25, 2008
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Yesterday morning brought the sound of sirens...didn't take long to realize Santa was making the rounds on a fire truck, visiting every neighborhood in West Whiteland township. Everyone has a marker of what the holidays mean to them, or something that sparks their own little holiday spirit and Santa on the fire truck has been one of mine for as long as I can remember. As I bundled up for a run (seldom riding these days, but that's okay...really), the sirens grew louder and louder...finally, the huge, red truck came ambling down our street...all the neighborhood kids scurried toward the curb, hands reaching out for candy canes, the smaller children covering their ears, mouths agape in disbelief. He's here! He's here! (My mom is a sucker for this tradition, too)... My run took me through woods and neighborhoods under cold, gray skies...by the time I returned home, there were tiny icicles tangled in my hair. I'm pretty sure I went through this last year...running shoes on my feet after cross had ended. Plans to ride French Creek were foiled this morning because of nasty weather...again, it's really okay. I was up late playing Apples to Apples with my friends, drinking the Prosecco that I won at Charm City. Truly, it's all good...
Monday, December 15, 2008
There are still days when I wake up and feel sorta...blindsided... I know, I know...Christmas is next week, the tree is up, the house is warm, there are yummy treats to be enjoyed, health & family to be thankful for, friends to catch up with, New Years Eve festivities to plan (more on that later, pencil it in)... Still, this time last year, I was plodding along... making peppermint bark... Creating a lovely Christmas card with warm wished from the Dubeck family... and I knew things were unraveling, though hoping things were just amiss, askew...still within reach... I didn't know what was coming, I couldn't have predicted my fate... Christmas, quite frankly, sucked...there, I've finally said it (exhale)... Nobody knew what was going on...sadly, I went through the motions...we all played along, ugh... Winter passed, big decisions were made... carefully, thoughtfully, little by little... until, suddenly...suddenly (!), it was July and I could no longer bear it...and I told my parents (what was I going to do, hold out forever? Wait til he moved out? Wait til I started working?)... So, here we are...back to December... And I am still grabbing at ideas and notions, trying to figure stuff out...just ordinary, everyday stuff... "Surreal" barely even nudges the way I feel... But, I am thankful and hopeful.
Friday, December 12, 2008
Woke up to a frightfully chipper four year-old tugging at me, "Woo-hoo, no school to-day-ay...let's have an adventure!! Woo-hoo!" Several lazy hours and 2 bowls of Cheerios later, we found ourselves at a Christmas tree farm (a real Christmas tree farm!!) with a cart and saws and... Are we really cutting down a tree??! We found a beautiful, full, gorgeous-smelling tree and hauled it back to the car... The fun didn't stop there... Back home, lights were strewn, ornaments unpacked... little by little, our home became Christmas-y (!) and I found myself breathing a little easier. We chopped down a tree under cloudy, gray skies...shivering, without any complaints or whining. Miraculous. Maybe things are looking up?
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
Saturday, December 6, 2008
My son turned four...his newest "thing" is calling me "Kim" or "Kimmy" or "Kimm-o"... Um, No. I took Colin to see David Byrne... I was sick & didn't touch my bike all week... My mom's brother passed away. I finally got the ball rolling on the IF fork I won at Granogue (I know, back in May)...thinking of converting the Litespeed to a rigid singlespeed...why not? My hair is getting long. I haven't spent enough time with my friends (but, this is the last weekend of racing). I am underwhelmed by my lack of preparedness for the holidays...I mean, Santa will arrive no matter what...right? Three friends are getting married this year and one is having a baby (one had a baby recently and I have yet to meet him)...just because my own marriage broke up does not mean I am cynical or bitter (ewww)...I am still a hopeless romantic, I still believe in love. So there.
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
Down and out...again. I am housebound/couchbound... Sniffle sniffle. There are eleven messages on my voicemail because it hurts to talk and I don't have the energy to answer the phone... waah wah wah... One of my bestest friends brought me ice cream last night to soothe my sore throat...minutes later, I had hives INSIDE my mouth, clowny lips, and an itchy throat...who has an allergic reaction to Better Batter ice cream with chocolate chips??? Me, that's who. No cross practice today... I guess practice is officially over now. I am rambling now because I am lonely and bored. My almost-four-year-old is at school...tomorrow is his birthday. This time 4 years ago, my due date was 5 days away... I was dilated, exasperated... Sunny Son had dropped & I was sensing some funny kind of wave deep inside me... I was probably doing what I am doing right now...snuggling a blanket, watching bad bad TV, all alone (no, wait...Hazel was still around...sigh)... counting the hours til the Christmas Parade. Now I am counting the hours til David Byrne, wondering if I can make it.